Living Intentionally: Why that word, why that topic...
I have never been a fan of New Years Resolutions. I'm not entirely sure why, but it could be because quite often our resolutions are so "high" that we just cannot realistically meet them. Or maybe it's the pressure of meeting them that causes us to "freeze" and go no further! Whatever it is, you have to decide for you what's going to work. Maybe you totally ROCK those resolutions, or maybe not!
Two years ago we went through some rather sudden changes that were certainly not in our plans, were pretty painful to our hearts and life altering in regards to our day to day lives and relationships. I won't go in to details but life as we knew it changed. I'm a fairly stable person, pretty solid, steady, go with the flow, but this threw me for a loop, hurt my heart and added some extra responsibility on my shoulders since my hubby no longer had a more flexible schedule. In a sense I felt like I lost a part of me. Who was I really? Who were my friends? I threw myself into taking care of my family, the lady I worked for, the kids I helped babysit and the "friendships" I had on FB because they seemed more accessible than the IRL (in real life) friendships that seemed to have dwindled and the ones that I felt I still had were so busy it was hard to coordinate schedules.
I let go of "me". I have always been a nurturer, peacemaker, hater of conflict and I just wanted to take care of everyone. Everyone but "me" that is. I quit exercising, gained 10 pounds and was just stuck in a rut. It wasn't that life wasn't good, it was, it was just different than what it had been, different than what we wanted it to be. Now, I know there are people going through things that would be considered far more intense or life shattering, but we all go through things that are like a smaller earthquake, not huge, but it can still be felt and it shakes us up a bit, messes a bit with our confidence and sense of security.
So, with that all said, I decided I needed to do some things differently in 2016. The main thing being taking care of me! Honestly, that was the only thing! I needed to take care of me, take time for me. Make me a priority. Because if I do that, then everything else will fall into place, and even if it doesn't, it won't fall apart either.
I decided to choose a word that would represent what I wanted to see happen in 2016. That word was INTENTIONAL!
Intentional = Done on purpose; deliberate.
What a great definition right? That is what I needed. I needed to take care of me on purpose, deliberately. Emotionally, Mentally, Physically (health and body), Spiritually. With INTENTION! I would find myself asking myself "is this intentional? Am I being intentional?". "Are the things I'm doing, thinking, feeling, being done, thought, or felt with intention?".
I know I have a long way to go, but I can sense changes. For me, I do best with little, achievable steps. I'm sure if I had to I could do big, drastic, cold turkey changes, but I'm more likely to be successful if they are small. So I take one day at a time. If I have an "off" day I'm working at not being discouraged or beating myself up, but recognizing it for what it is and evaluating what I need to do differently, or why I was "off". Yesterday, I found myself snacking more and I needed to stop and think about why I was doing this. I think I was really tired, had a bit of a stressful day and that was probably the reason...I didn't take time to be "intentional" with those things and they got away from me.
By the waters of reflection, my soul remembers who I am...
New addition: Well, I didn't do so well up to this point...it was so easy to fall back into the rut I was walking in. I can't say that it was all for naught, but it wasn't what I was thinking. Because of that I've decided to take the word into next year as well. I love that word, I don't feel like it is ever an "old" word.
I hope that you'll journey with me as we reflect, and remember who we are!